Habits are like Comfortable Shoes

young woman on street in sneakers and high heels shoes are next to her

In order to take a new and different path in life, you have to be willing to get rid of your most comfortable shoes habits. They got you here, but they are not supporting your new journey.

Let’s review. You were born, years past, things happened.  You’re in the middle of living your daily life. Some problems in life come and go, others we carry around like they are stuck on the bottom of our shoes. Then there’s mid-life.  Wow!

Seriously, our life was mapped out for years. We chose things like  education, significant others, weddings,  cars, the home, kids, careers, and so much more.

All of a sudden, we are getting things we didn’t put on the want list.  Wrinkles, bad eyes, gray hair, extra rolls of fat, menopause, aging parents, and kids leaving home-or maybe not.

Remember when a “midlife crisis” was all about buying a camper or quitting your job and traveling the world. We’ve evolved and there are new rising trends and they look a lot different.  There’s that thing called being an entrepreneur, meditating your stress away for well being, retreats, and Keto diets.

Here’s the thing. As time passes, we arrive or pass the middle of life marker.  For years we had a strong picture of what our life would look like.  We definitely visualized a vague idea of what retirement looked like.  We would travel, live in a warmer climate, get rid of the big house, and love all over the grand kids.  You would STOP working for sure.

We were driven by our goals to provide for our family, have a career, or stay home and raise the kids. Along the way we bought lots of stuff. (car-house-pool-furniture-vacations-lifestyle).

There is something very important missing from this list.  As a midlife coach I here the same story over and over. An admission by  omission, women putting their personal self-care last.  I’m not talking about hair, nails and cloths, ladies.  Oh, there were lots of reasons.  Not enough time or money, the kids come first, and the best one-it just didn’t seem important at the time.

The results of focusing on circumstance, money, family needs, and time spent caring for others while mostly negating the value of our own self-care is suddenly apparent.

Your hear and the future vision about life after 50 is happening.  It’s no longer a vague idea.

Because most women dedicate their lives to doing for others, we identify a big part of our self-worth based on our career.  We have dedicated our lives to that behavior.  For myself, I did identify myself based on my successful careers. The dynamics with my parents evolved to my being the parent.  As I moved to different parts of the country for various careers, my circle of friends widened.  Some remained and some faded away.

It was only when I began to realize I don’t have to work; my kids are grown, and I am not responsible for their well being that I suddenly felt a bit lost. The future is now in my face. What’s next?  I suddenly recognized my body, my life as I knew it had changed without my permission and I wasn’t so sure about what to do next.

Suddenly you wake up in the middle of your life on the other side of a lot of your goals.  Then and only then do you start to ask the question-What about me? If this is you, congratulations.  You have finally arrived its your turn!  Every day can be a “YOU DAY.”

Now ladies, no excuses.  Embrace it.  What might a “you day” look like, feel like, be like?  Some might say it’s a do nothing day or stop doing what I’ve been doing day.  I say it’s an igniting new possibilities day!

Seriously, don’t tell me you don’t know how to do this. You’ve been practicing this skill of taking care of others your whole life.  You’ve been showing everyone else how to do it. The time is now ladies. You are ready to focus on yourself.

The only thing holding you back right now are those excuses you programmed in your mind for years.  You believe them to be true.  There’s no makeup, diet, surgical procedure, new relationship, location, or time that is going to satisfy your old and out of date programmed belief that you are not the important one here.

The outer you, the self-talking one, that’s looking in the mirror, reviewing your surroundings, and questioning what’s next is tilting you more out of focus.

You see, for most of your life you had a plan for what to do.  Because that plan involved everything except really taking care of yourself, it’s hard to re-focus 100% on YOU.

You need a new plan.  You’re stuck in the middle of the road, with an old map.  You have no experience on how to move yourself out the routine of your past life.

If you feel stuck in the “what’s next” rut, you need to know life is wide open to you.  You can FINALLY put yourself first.  That’s scary shit for some of us.  It’s like learning to walk and talk all over again.  You already have the skills to do this, so relax.  I promise you do.

You just need re-adjust your focus. Let’s do this thing together.  Have some fun and embrace what’s next right now.

Come on, get on my calendar and sign up for a free consult.  Wrap it up ladies, give yourself the best gift ever.  Next step get out of the middle of the road, life going forward is all about YOU!

What’s Next? It’s all about YOU!!

Your Midlife and Beyond Certified Life Coach

Show up * Think Different * Kick ass * Be All In





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