At the core, everything is a habit.  Listening, not listening, grateful-ungrateful, healthy thoughts-negative thoughts.

Let’s examine some habits from our past that manifest unworthy unlovable feelings. Our habits either drive us forward or we drive them in a circle of sameness.  Things happen that create a belief manifesting feelings of unworthiness and unlovable attitude.   We feel wounded and unable to confidently move past the roadblocks on our drive through life.  We either reject the idea,  face it and find a way around it or we stay stuck behind the wounded habit.  As children, we don’t have the capacity to understand or handle some of our wounds.  As adults, we have all the capacity to heal all of our wounds.

From the beginning, all babies are born worthy and lovable.  Life brings 50/50, the up and down, good and bad times filled with plenty of great and good things along with bumps, boulders, and maybe some really traumatic wounds and scarring along the way.

We layer habits over the core of our being.  Believe me, I’ve experienced traumatic wound habits myself. It is not possible to move forward in a healthy healing manner as long as you dig, poke, ruminate and drag it right into your current daily life.  All too often we live with unhealed toxic festering pain believing those past experiences cause us to be unworthy and unlovable.  Since we know that no one can take our lovable and worthy from us, it’s not physically possible., then you can’t be unlovable or unworthy simply because you feel hurt and wounded. It’s a conflict for you.  You want to be happy, but you want to believe you aren’t worthy.  You feel so wounded and you want to believe you aren’t lovable.

It is so important to heal your wounds.  You must learn how to let go of your habit of holding onto the painful stories you tell that cause you to live within your wound.

Are you picking at your wounded habits?  Get this fact, no one can make you feel anything.  Not happy or sad, worthy or unworthy.  And certainly not lovable or unlovable.  It’s a FEELING.  Yes, feelings are real.  How you get a feeling comes straight out of your thoughts you gave your brain.  Thoughts are just your opinion about what has happened.  You decide if you feel worthy or loved.  NO ONE can make you feel that way.

Think of a teenager who is mad at their parents.  They yell, “I hate you.”  As a parent, we can decide that hurts our feelings or we can decide they are just being a brat.  We get to decide how we feel about everything.  That teenager does not have the power to change our feelings.

Unfortunately, most of us go through life believing that other people’s actions, words, and behaviors are responsible for our feelings.  No one can be responsible for your feelings.  Other people can have their option, you don’t have to believe it.

Love is a feeling you have towards yourself and for others.  Everyone has their own personal dictionary defining what love means to them.  And that is most often the reason we jump to the conclusion we are unworthy or unlovable.  Maybe they love us, maybe they don’t, maybe they interpret love differently.

Who gets to decide if you are worthy or not?  No one else, just you. You control what you think. You do not control what other people think about you. PERIOD

Stop reacting to other people’s opinions.

Your Midlife & Beyond Certified Life Coach

Show Up * Think Different * Kick Ass * Be All In